The first day of the month is important to the Greek culture. We say to everyone Kalo Mina, which means "good month". It is the Greek way of wishing friends, family, and everyone around us a happy month, filled with love, and good fortune.
So I wish you all a Kalo Mina this December :-)
Where did this year go? I'm sitting here with my mistletoe candle lit and my turmeric tea. I'm reflecting, and I can't believe how this year has unfolded. There is one month left, so I ask you what are you going to do? Is there something you have been waiting to do? We need to stop waiting for the New Year, or the beginning of the week to chase something we want. Find what it is that you have been putting on hold, and start making that dream come true, start working towards that goal. Everything takes time, but if you put a little effort in you will see how it adds up.
The years go by fast, the days faster, and I get anxious how can I take in each moment?
I looked back at a picture my roommate sent me, and I began to tear. I so desperately wanted to go back to that apartment to relieve that year of love, adventure, and friendships. It hit me that I thought I would have lots of those moments with particular people, and I guess that I was naive, and I did truly enjoy them when I was there, but I looked back, and I had a longing for what was.
I saw the couch and remembered all the hockey games, the laughs, the memories that were in that room, the all night studying, those beautiful windows that I would watch the seasons change from the 7th floor -
This nostalgia filled up my cavity, and I felt like I wanted to call the person I missed, which was so strange, it hadn't hit me in years, and these emotions were flying around my heart.
Gather. Gather, those emotions when they hit you and sit with them. Meditate with them for a little and understand what they mean.
Time is moving, and life goes on,
And what I have learned is that I have no room in my heart for anger, disappointments, and hurts. Whats in the past is in the past, and I cherish all the beautiful memories I had, and each of those memories and experiences shaped me to who I am right now writing this. Everything fell into place like it was supposed too, I didn't understand the statement "trust the universe" for a long time, till recently.
If I look back at that picture, I get filled with tears because it was a beautiful time, wonderful years filled with so much growing, If everything had worked out perfectly, I wouldn't have had this book being published, if I were trotting off in the sunset with the boy I loved I wouldn't have been doing all of these amazing things that I needed to do.
I needed to find out who I was first, I look back at that picture and I remember being the girl who just loved too big, too much, who just had her heart out on a buffet. (You will find out more about this in my book)
But I think about the New Year, and it's a little worrisome but what I do know is that I can't worry about it. What I can do is just control this moment, these words. I have to stop planning, and being nervous about things that have not yet happened. 2017 is approaching, I'm in awe that my story will be shared with so many souls, that my words will be in print. Even if nobody knows about my book, I'm so proud of being able to say that my words made it into print, that has always been a dream of mine.
I'm nervous how my words will be taken that people won't understand me, but that's okay. Not everyone is going to like my work, or understand my words. All I can do is write, and be truthful to me, and my story. If I can touch one heart, heal one person's heartache, self-doubt, it was all worth it. The way I feel about my book coming out is: "The Window of my soul I throw wide open to the sun." - John Greenleaf Whittier
I sit here with my tea and writing my yoga sequence for class this week, and I think about the years that are flying by, and all I know is that each day I wake up and I'm thankful that I can get out of bed. Anything else that comes my way I will deal with, I'm getting older - but I'm not worried like I used to be.
The year is slowly coming to an end, make it a beautiful transition to the next chapter you are writing.
Every year is filled with some sadness, frustration, hurt, I'm not numb to those things, I'm human as well - I do the best I can, we all do the best we can.
All I'm saying is that years are going by fast, take a look at what you are doing, if you are unhappy in a situation, relationship, job - make the move. You deserve to live the life you want.
December always reminds me of so much nostalgia.
Thanks for reading my December thoughts/rant. :- )